


Domestic Dalliances

by PuppetMaster55



Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: Anal Fingering, Crossdressing Kink, Exhibitionism, F/M, Gags, Masturbation, Mutual Masturbation, PREPARE FOR SECONDHAND EMBARRASSMENT BECAUSE OF THAT, Puns & Word Play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-02
Updated: 2017-06-02
Packaged: 2018-11-08 04:33:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11074146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PuppetMaster55/pseuds/PuppetMaster55
Summary: Danny and Valerie take a step forward in their relationship.





	Domestic Dalliances

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Dream_Trance](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dream_Trance/gifts).



> Finally posting this here from over on tumblr. An old christmas present for dream-trance.

“So you know what to expect with this?”

They were in Valerie's room, her dad out working a late shift, and Danny rolled his eyes as he set his backpack down by the door. “You've met my parents. The Talk was very thorough about what to expect. There were diagrams.” He shuddered, memories flashing before his eyes. “Diagrams.”

Valerie raised an eyebrow, unable to comprehend the horrors of the Fenton Safe Sex Education (featuring the Fenton Safe Sex Diagrams). “Mmm-hmm.”

“You say that now.” Danny wagged a finger at where she sat on the edge of her bed. “But you don't know what you're getting into.”

“And you do.” Valerie didn't sound like she was questioning him. “Look, we are clear on what's gonna happen, right? I'm gonna undress and you're gonna undress and we're gonna–”

“Jerk each other off, yeah.” Danny nodded, fingers curling into a familiar grip and rocking back and forth. He froze, realized what he was doing, and shook his hand. Valerie warily glanced from the hand to Danny's face and back.

“That's... above our relationship pay grade. I am going to forget you did that and take my bra off. Then we can get undressed.” Valerie reached one arm behind her and Danny shrieked.

“Wait!” He frantically waved his hands around. “Why are you taking it off now?!”

Valerie blinked, stared at Danny. Her arm fell to her side, then she crossed her arms. “Okay, rule one: any woman taking their bra off is nowhere near as sexy as you think it is. No one pays attention to taking off a shirt – well, the chest gets a lot of attention – but the point. The point is seeing my breasts. Taking off a bra is not like taking off underwear. There's no reveal of the booty. Booby, no reveal of the booby. Taking off the bra is rarely sexy. Now, I'mma take off this bra. You gonna watch. Then we take off our clothes together.”

Danny winced, lowering his hands while Valerie reached behind her back again, unclasping her bra. One after the other, she pulled the straps off her arms through the sleeves of her shirt, and then reached down the front collar and pulled out the bra. Danny blinked. “Wow.”

“Just take your clothes off.” Valerie paused, then added, “But, like, face me when you lift that shirt. Then turn around for the pants and underwear. And yes, I'll do the same for you.”

He opened his mouth to say that he totally wasn't going to look, but the protest died in his throat as Valerie lifted up her shirt, giving him a good view of her entire chest, abs and all. The shirt lifted higher, and he let out a strangled gurgling noise as the abs flexed and shifted and _galloping ghosts that muscle definition_.

Valerie raised a single eyebrow at Danny's response, tossing her shirt to the side and giving him an expectant look as she unbuttoned her capris. She stood up, unzipping and turning on her heel so Danny could get a good look at tight and pert butt – and the light purple panties stretched over it all – while the capris were pulled down, stepped out of, and discarded. Valerie's thumbs hooked under the band of the purple panties... and stopped. “Now you take off your clothes. That's enough of my booty that you're drooling over, I wanna see that nice man butt of yours.”

Danny scrabbled out of his shirt, the collar catching on one ear and nearly sending him toppling onto the floor. He then flung his arm out to one side, intending to toss the shirt away, only to have the sleeve still on his arm. The arm shook, the shirt flapping and wrapping around it until Danny groaned, untangling it and yanking his forearm free. Valerie snorted back a laugh. “That had to be the most unsexy time a shirt was ever taken off. Try not to trip on your jeans.”

He flushed, ruddy and blotchy on his face. “Shut up.”

The halfa turned around, unbuttoning and unzipping his fly. He nudged the jeans down past his thighs, letting them drop down when they got past his knees, and made to step out of them.

Danny tripped on his pants, his head missing the bedpost by inches. Thankfully, the floor was there to break his fall.

Valerie snorted, unable to stifle her laughter, and flopped onto her side. Danny, meanwhile, was trying to get his feet out of his pants, failing, and reconciling by taking off his socks to try and make it easier. He glared at the fallen Valerie. “Do _not_.”

Valerie gulped down air, her laughter dwindling into giggles. “I didn't say anything.”

“You were thinking it.”

“And what are you gonna do about it?”

Danny smirked, finally getting his feet free. He lifted both arms, flexed his fingers, and launched himself onto the bed, knocking into Valerie and running his fingers all along her sides. She barked out laughter, twisting and shoving against her boyfriend while he sniggered and kept tickling her. “S–stop! Stop!”

He stopped, ending up pressed against her back as his arms wrapped around her stomach. His hands splayed against Valerie's abs, feeling them move as she heaved and caught her breath. Danny pressed his face against her neck, pulled back when her hair got in his face, spat when it got in his mouth. “Ack. Gah. Peh, peh.”

Valerie glanced at him, one hand moving to stop the hands (that were miraculously _still_ running all over her abs) while the other fluffed up her hair, moving it out of Danny's face. “Oh my god, Danny, how can you still try for sex after all that?”

Danny spat out the last lingering strands of hair, and gave his girlfriend a big smile. “Determination. Me and my boner are unwavering in the face of your beauty. And the abs of your beauty. And the beauty of your booty.”

“The beauty of my booty?” Valerie barked out a laugh. “Only you would find puns sexy.”

Danny held one hand up to his face, licked a finger, and pressed it to his butt while making a sizzling noise. “Are you saying these puns _aren't_ sexy?”

“Puns, not buns.” Valerie couldn't hold back the laughter, turning on her side to face her boyfriend and thwap him on the shoulder. “Although they are sexy buns.” Danny repeated the gesture, sizzling noise and all. Valerie thwapped him again. “You cannot seduce me with puns.”

“I can try.” He only laughed when she thwapped him a third time. “Look at all this _pun_ -ishment I'm getting over my wea- _puns_ of mass seduction.”

Valerie groaned, “If we continue with the sexy, will the puns stop?”

“I can't guarantee they won't stop.” He reached out, fingers tracing her abs. “But I will _abs_ -olutely give it a try.”

“I hate you.” Valerie picked up her pillow and whapped Danny in the face with it. The halfa flopped onto his back beside her from the blow.

He laughed, settling down beside her. “And yet...”

She snorted, a fond smile on her lips. “And yet.”

His hand tentatively moved lower, circling her bellybutton. “So... we still on for the sexy?”

She took his hand in her own, gently guiding it over his own chest. “Actually... why don't we just, just... watch.”

Danny blinked, did a double-take from their clasped hands to Valerie. “Watch?”

“Each other.” Valerie lowered their hands until they hovered over the tented blue boxers. “I... I want to watch you. And you get to watch me.”

She looked down, and he followed her gaze back to his boxers, and the slip of pinkish-purple that could be seen through the fly. Danny's eyes went wide when Valerie laid his hand atop his crotch, her hand moving to cover her own. _Oh..._ “Uh.”

“I-if you don't, that's alright. We can just lay here. Cuddle. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable.” Valerie's voice faltered at his lack of response. “I just... was curious. How you, you know...”

“I– right– no– yes.” Danny stumbled over the words, thumbs hooking underneath the waistband of his boxers. He shimmied, lifting his hips so he take the underwear completely off. “Yes, wow. I. Yes. Galloping Ghouls I am down for that. Except my penis. Which is up. For that. Watching.”

Valerie wasn't really listening, caught up in staring at Danny's dick. He flushed, hands moving to cover it self-consciously, only to be stopped by Valerie's own hands. “No! No, it's... I just wasn't expected it to look so... is it supposed to tilt to the left like that?”

“What?” Danny looked down at his crotch in alarm, seeing the curly black pubic hair surrounding his dick. The dick itself looked normal to him – the slim head clearly visible when he wrapped his hand around the shaft, his fingers barely touching his palm from how thick it was. It curved to the left a little, of course, but Danny figured that was because of all the years spent masturbating. “It looks normal to me.” He lightly squeezed his hand, feeling it pulse in his grip. “See? Perfectly normal.”

“Okay.” Valerie held up her hands, shrugging before moving her thumbs down beneath the waistband of her panties. “No judging each other's stuff? Because I _know_ my vagina won't look like you're expecting. I don't judge your penis, you don't judge my vagina, agreed?”

Danny spared a glance at the purple panties before meeting Valerie's eyes. “Agreed.”

She lifted her hips as she shimmied, the panties soon off and tossed to the side, and Danny stared at...

“Hair.” Danny hadn't been expecting so much hair, and noticed that it didn't stop where her panties did, instead continuing down into leg hair just like his own. And spread further down and into the space between her legs. Valerie reached down, further than Danny thought she would, and opened her legs out. Her left leg laid over his right, and with the precision of experience her fingers parted the hair to reveal the vagina. It wasn't like he'd expected it to look, instead looking more like a deep cleft in the skin than a pair of lips. The cleft looked puffy, though, and wet – the surrounding hair seemed almost matted from the wetness, and he thought he saw something purpleish-pink at the upper end – the clitoris, he realized. “So do you just, like, stick your fingers in and... pump?”

“No!” Valerie scoffed. “Now I get out the lubricant.”

“Lubricant?” Danny squinted. “Like, lotion?”

“Like, lubricant.” Valerie twisted, reaching out and pulling out a plastic bottle of clear liquid. “The female orgasm cannot be reached just by shoving something into the vagina a lot. What, do you just pump your hand a lot?”

“Yes, exactly.” Danny felt a need to defend himself. “But there's other stuff I do sometimes. Butt stuff.”

“What stuff.” Valerie unscrewed the lid, carefully putting a little of the liquid on her fingers before holding the bottle out toward Danny. “Here, try it with lube.”

“What?” Danny stared at the bottle like it was an alien.

Valerie stared at her boyfriend. “Your hand. Hold it out. Try masturbating with lube, see how it feels. You won't need very much.” She squeezed a little into the palm of Danny's hand when he obliged her. “There. Coat your boner in that, but know that it's gonna be cold at first.”

Danny wrapped his hand back around his dick, shivering at the cold sensation, before it was replaced with a more pleasant, warmer sensation. Pre-cum welled up at the tip as he started to pump his hand, turning his hand a little so that the lubricant could get all over his cock. It felt strange to him, strange and foreign and exciting. More and more pre welled up on each stroke, and he had to keep his strokes long and slow, feeling Valerie's gaze on his every movement. The pre dribbled down onto the shaft, mixing with the lube and adding a faint popping noise with each stroke.

He shifted his gaze over onto Valerie's hands, hoping to match his pace with hers, only to see that she was dragging her middle finger all along the outer edge of her vagina and rubbing circles around the clitoris. Her other hand was gently tracing the outlines of her abs, moving from high on the sternum all the way down past the bellybutton. Fingertips swept from side to side, all along her waistline and back up the center of her chest. Twice her thumb spiraled around her breasts, tracing circles around both nipples, before her hand returned back down below the waist.

The other hand, meanwhile, had started to push the middle finger inside, almost halfway to the second knuckle. Valerie bent her fingers, using her knuckles to pinch and stretch the opening, allowing more of her finger to slip inside. Her index finger joined in, slipping inside as well, and Danny gulped down air as the vagina kept getting stretched. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted that Valerie's other hand had returned to tracing along her inner thighs.

It was at that point that he made the realization that maybe Valerie was purposely putting on a show for him, and he started to become aware of just how repetitive and unappealing it must be to watch his hand move up and down. Options passed through his mind, mostly centered on what he usually did – take his free hand, cover the fingers in as much saliva as he could, and start fingering himself. And he would have done it immediately, but...

Was their relationship pay grade even at doing the butt stuff yet? Could he chance it? _Would_ he chance it? Danny had spent almost a year fingering himself every time he masturbated – he wasn't even sure he could cum without some sort of prostate stimulation.

Fingertips ghosted along his scrotum, and Danny shivered as he moved his other hand lower, tracing along the raised line that spanned all down his shaft and the middle of his scrotum – he couldn't remember what the Fenton Safe Sex Diagrams had called– _abort train abort abort abort_ – down into the space between his balls and his anus. He gently searched for the spot, the little bump that – _there!_

Danny arched his back, spreading his legs out so he could he could better feel the area – and give Valerie as much of a show as she was giving him. Digging his heels into the mattress, he lifted his hips, allowing him better access to the perineum. The hairs on his scrotum were pushed aside, the heel of his palm ghosting along the skin while his fingers dragged all along the perineum. Sparks of pleasure danced along his spine and beneath the edges of his skin; his lips, fingers, and toes tingled.

Valerie's leg hooked around his, and Danny watched as she slid her index and middle fingers down to the knuckle in her vagina. Her arm lifted, wrist bending to reach deeper, and Valerie gasped, hips arching in a move Danny recognized as a need for more. His hips bucked again, and he glanced from Valerie's vagina and his dick. “So... is it okay for me to _peen_ -etrate you?”

Valerie stopped moving, turning to give Danny a Look. “You keep with the puns and there ain't never gonna be no peens -enetrating anything.”

Danny laughed, a breathy wheeze. “You don't have to _pun-_ ish me.” He exhaled. “And I think you mean -etrating. Because eventually there will be peens -etrating. One peen. My peen. The Danny dick.”

Valerie kept staring at Danny, before pulling her hands away and bending over the edge of the bed. She rummaged around things, and Danny blinked, eyebrows raising in surprise.

“Wait, really? Are you getting a condom? And also the lube? _Can_ I wear a condom with my peen all lubed up like this? Won't it just slip – fwuguh.” Danny's mouth was stuffed with something – he didn't know what – that she tied around his head.

“I warned you to stop. And now you're getting gagged. Try to take it off and I'll have to tie you up. Leave _that_ ,” she gestured at his dick, which twitched in his grip, “to be under my control. I will control when you have your orgasm, _if_ you have your orgasm.”

Danny felt butterflies in his stomach, fluttering in excitement at the idea of someone else being so in control over his body. For a moment he considered trying to untie the gag, before deciding against it. Maybe next time he would...

No. Of course not.

He nodded, accepting her terms, waiting until she settled back into masturbating before staring up again. He was already close enough to the edge, especially after being gagged by... whatever that was. It was fabric, he knew that much – a shirt, maybe?

Trying not to focus on the gag, Danny picked up the pace, making his strokes quicker and shorter, feeling the pleasure build up like a knot, and he watched Valerie's fingers sink back inside of her, her thumb gathering up what lube hadn't been spread too thin and rubbing at her clit. He closed his eyes and laid back, imagining that it was her hands wrapped around his dick, were her fingers reaching down, down.

A fingertip pressed against his anus, slipping inside.

Danny's hips bucked as his orgasm happened. The first shot went long, splashing onto his face and hitting about an inch below his left eye. The second spurt landed on his left nipple, the third just above his bellybutton. The fourth and fifth shots dribbled out, falling onto his pubic hair, quickly joined by the last vestiges of his orgasm. He kept stroking, squeezing on the upstroke to draw out what little of his cum remained inside, Danny's hand getting cum all over it.

He opened his eyes to see Valerie coming down from her own orgasm, and he felt a twinge of regret that he hadn't seen it over the throes of his own orgasm. Next time, he promised himself. Next time he would see her orgasm. He reached up with his clean (well, clean _er_ ) hand and untied the gag, tossing it aside.

They were both panting, both shaky, and both of them smiled when they met each others gaze. Danny reached a hand up to wipe the sweat out of his eyes, only to end up smearing his forehead with cum. He chuckled. “Don't suppose you have a, like, towel down there or something?”

“I have wet wipes.” Valerie snorted back laughter, pulling out a pack of wipes, setting them down between herself and Danny. “Good for quick cleanup. Post-orgasm is very... sticky.”

“Oh yeah.” Danny pulled out several wipes, used up half of them cleaning up his chest, and the other half on his hand. He grabbed another handful, paused, glanced at his now-flaccid cock, and grabbed another three wipes. “I keep a towel by my bed, but usually try to masturbate in the shower.” He held up the fistful of used wipes. “Wastebasket?”

Valerie rolled her eyes. “Other side of me. After,” she held up a hand, “you clean up the rest of you. I don't want no messes on my bedspread or me. Lucky enough you didn't spray everywhe– hold up. A towel?”

“I wash it! Semi-often!” Danny defended his towel, indignation rising through him. “Once a week, when I can manage it! Mostly every other week, but that's because I don't get laundry duty very often and I definitely want to avoid having that conversation with Mom about why there's a crusty towel shedding yellow-ish flakes in the washer.”

“You have a nasty towel and none of this is anything I ever wanted to know.” Valerie held out a hand, sitting up to put more distance between her and her boyfriend. “You are gonna toss that towel and replace it with a tissue box. And a bottle of lube. Put your clothes back on, we're going shopping. Gonna fix this messed-up thing you got going on.”

“What?” Danny scrabbled to sit up. “How did we go from the sexy to this? And where are my boxers?”

Valerie threw her legs over the side of the bed, moving to stand up. “Wherever you tossed them just now. They're what I shoved into your mouth to gag your awful puns.”

“You agreed, my puns are sexy.” Danny grabbed his boxers, shaking them in the air as he shimmied to the side of the bed. He froze as he realized just how soaked his boxers were. “Oh, ew! Val, ew! You made my boxers all wet with spit.”

“ _You_ made your boxers all wet with _your_ spit.” Valerie opened the uppermost dresser drawer, pulling out a new pair of panties. Danny watched with disbelief as she stepped into them and slipped the panties on. She raised a judgmental eyebrow. “What? Just put them on, you've worn worse.”

“Sweaty, smelly gym clothes are not the same.” Danny shifted his grip until the boxers were held between his thumb and forefinger – and at arm's length. “This is not a gross I wanna put on my body.”

“Then just put on your jeans.” Valerie picked up Danny's jeans, tossing them at his head. He dropped the boxers, barely catching the pants before they hit. “Isn't that something guys like doing? What do you call it – some army term or something?”

“I am _not_ going commando!” Danny became half-hard at the idea of just one layer of denim between his crotch and the world, then went back soft at the thought of rubbing against the metal teeth of the zipper. A thought occurred to him, and he cringed. “Or wearing your dad's underwear.”

Valerie cringed at the idea, glancing at the discarded boxers. “Then you're stuck wearing your boxers. Either that or I loan you a pair of my underwear.”

“Uh.” Danny felt his face blush hot and red, and his cock pulse and start to fill with blood. “That... um.”

“Oh my god.” Valerie paused with her arms in her shirt. “Oh my god you're actually considering it.” She did a double-take from Danny's crotch to his face. “And you're _into it_. Danny Fenton, you a really kinky man.”

“Uh.” He moved his pants to cover the half-hearted boner. “Does... does this mean I'm _not_ wearing your underwear?”

Valerie looked Danny over, then turned to stare at the open drawer. “I didn't say that. Just wondering if I have a good fit for you. Your hips are way less bigger than mine, but having a dick might compensate.” She squinted at her boyfriend. “Are you okay wearing anything in a bright green?”

Danny tried not to let the laughter show, but couldn't stop the smile from showing. “Bright green is actually a pretty good look on me.”


End file.
